"I came so far for beauty...

...I left so much behind. My patience and my family, my masterpiece unsigned." ---------------------------------------------------------------
Hello there. First things first - I'd like to specify that this blog might be triggering. I myself do not by any means wish to promote whatever shape or form of self harm there might be. It may appear so at times, I do admit; I chose myself quite the painful path to hell, no need to follow it with me (people who promote EDs as such ought to be taken out and shot, 'scuse my impudence). It is a cliché, I agree (it is a cliché that most clichés are true, but then like most clichés, that cliché is untrue), that my body is a temple and it shall become gorgeous under my touch, brilliant to behold by myself and my own standards. Those were the initial thoughts, when I first started this balderdash. Now, there is no 'self control' as people think anorexics display in such a breathtaking manner. You have no self control, that's the damn problem. It controls you like a master puppeteer and the worst part is...You know if it cut the strings, you would be a limp nothing without the ability to move, let alone live. Until there comes a point where there is no 'it', or 'ana' or 'ED'. You merge in such a way that you, your very essence would cease to exist, mind and body, if the disorder was to be taken away from you (the strings, in other words). It just takes and takes, grabs, feeds off you. As if it were binging. On you. There is a much deeper reason for my eating disorder per se, but that's just a tad personal to place into a description. If you want help losing weight, there are healthy ways and I'd be more than happy to share them (been there, done that). This blog is run by a seventeen year old girl, art student, with a liking for old music and literature. I spend my days with my guitar (and the works of Leonard Cohen), poetry and books (Oscar Wilde, Stephen Fry, Bertrand Russell), my own writing, wannabe poetry and illustrative sketching, dancing (jive and swing mostly) and of course, my anorexia. Which usually lets me do none of the above. Pleased to meet you.